Want a clue about God’s will for you? It’s not as specific as you think.
Our three boys were in high-school and my husband and I knew they needed to start planning for college. We researched for a long time and finally decided on five universities which we thought were academically and morally appropriate and—bottom line—which we could afford.
It was important, too, that each location provided opportunities for the boys to work and participate in the cost of their education. Skin in the game and all that!
So, we presented our plan to the oldest who researched on his own and, from our five, picked the one he liked the best. He applied, was accepted, and all the exciting preparations began.
God is like that with his children.
Among the many choices in life that we have, he has considered what is good for us and benevolently and wisely narrowed it down. He has set firm limits with the ten commandments, biblical truths, and the traditional guidelines set by his Church. He’s also given us gifts, talents, and graces to use our free will wisely.
But then he steps back, in a sense, and says, “Okay, kids, you choose!”
As parents, it was a delight for us to provide each of the boys the freedom to choose their own path. And they were even more thrilled to dream, plan, and then act—exercising that freedom to choose (within boundaries) what was uniquely pleasing to them. When it comes to choosing a spouse, career, home, or other life goal or dream, Often there may be many different and appropriate choices we make that would be pleasing to God, and within his divine will. Not just one.
Considering my own past, and that of the clients with whom I work, it seems the only time we are afraid to make a big decision is when:
- We don’t yet have the skills to properly discern. That’s where a good coach can help!
- We don’t yet have all the information needed to make a wise decision. That, too, is where a capable coach can assist.
- We’ve made a horrible mess of things in the past and don’t trust ourselves. Can’t God just send us a big, fat, neon sign? Coaches can help their clients assess and regain confidence in the gifts God has already given them.
- We’re over-attached to the safe and familiar and have talked ourselves out of taking any risk. A thoughtful coach can help clients examine those thoughts and begin to replace them.
- We don’t really know how much he loves us, and we are afraid—maybe even terrified—of his judgement. That’s where God can reach hearts through a loving, patient, coach who lives out and conveys that love.
This is a complex matter worthy of some quiet, arm-chair contemplation. Since this topic is important to my clients, I’ve written more on this in these blogs:
And, as with any important and sober subject, we must also keep our sense of humor, as I’m quite sure God the Father does. How do I know?
When I asked our oldest why he chose the college he did, he laughed jokingly and said, “Because Playboy magazine reported they have the hottest chicks.”
Just kidding? Maybe.
Lord, show us your will and have mercy on us all!
About Rose Sweet
You’ve heard her on Catholic radio and TV! Rose Sweet is a retreat guide, conference speaker, life, and relationship coach with more than 30 years’ pastoral and business experience. She’s been single, married, divorced, remarried, a mom, adoptive mom, and stepmom. Rose has also pioneered and been a powerful voice in separated, divorced, annulment and blended family ministries, having created the “Surviving Divorce” video series used in hundreds of parishes and sixteen countries.
Rose has authored fourteen books on healing and strengthening relationships that draw from Scripture, Church teachings, Pope John Paul II’s ‘Theology of the Body’, wisdom of the saints, and the timeless truths of the classic four temperaments. With heart and humor Rose offers practical tips to help her coaching clients create a life plan where they can “think outside the box, but within the mind of the Church.” To connect with Rose, visit her directory profile at https://www.catholiclifecoaches.com/rose-sweet
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